On life, and living.
It’s been a long, long time since I’ve updated this (254 days, to be exact), and I realize that’s some sort of cardinal sin of bloggery, but here I am. Unrepentant.
The initial focus of this blog was to catalogue, discuss, and poke good-natured fun at the various symptoms/subjects of anxiety disorders and OCD. Some of my posts stayed true to this, others devolved into the same sort of navel-gazing and reblogging that can be found pretty much anywhere, and I apologize for that. Never again!
From this point on, I will be updating regularly (or trying to) and ensuring that the focus remains on disordered thinking. Yes, to some extent that will be informed by what I’ve experienced and what I’m currently experiencing, but it’ll be all about madness from here on in.
The reasons for my lapse in updates are many - sickness, work, school, love life - but at the core it’s just another symptom of disordered thinking. Failure to live up to my own expectations, which snowballs into avoidance and anxiety, which eventually grows into full-fledged neglect. So! No more of that.
The handful of you I’ve had direct contact with, I hope that you’ll get more of what you started following for. The rest of you… uh, well, to be frank you weird me out a bit, but in a flattering way. I figured it would be easier to deliver a state of the union than to try and retroactively provide context when a post demanded it. So here you go!
- I’m engaged! (to C, of previous mention) Wedding planning is one of my favourite past-times, so this is one of the best things ever. Also, I guess I’m happy to be with her forever or something.
- I’m pursuing a formal conversion to Judaism, which involves learning Hebrew and prayers and a lot of other things that are technically interesting but mostly involves a lot of awkward socializing.
- I’m pleasantly (if stressfully) engaged in a number of hitherto intimidating activities, like going for frequent walks around the neighbourhood and serving as a front-line volunteer for beloved causes. Here’s to progress!
- I’m in the process of figuring out a withdrawal plan, so to speak, to minimize and hopefully eliminate most of my medication. That’ll be a fun ride.
- For a change, I’ve used my own picture instead of one stolen from the webs. This particular one is (moving clockwise from the left) my eldest sister, my second sister, and myself. We’re all about 6 months old, and the pictures cover the 60s, 70s, and 80s (respectively). C and I were going through old albums and I was struck by the thought that as much as I feel isolated from my siblings due to my diagnosis and experiences, at some point they had to deal with their own shit, by themselves. Family history is an important topic to me, and a lot of things go unspoken either because people deem them unimportant or no one worth talking to was around. I’ve resolved to try (here, at least) to extend my musings on my issues to how it might relate to, well, the relations. Also, the pictures were cute.
That’s all for tonight.
- ocdelightful posted this